One Shot: Drabbles & short stories
by NoLove10
Summary: Short stories/drabbles that I'm sometimes too lazy to turn into multi-chapters. Suggestions are welcomed/accepted
1. In Which Oliva & Fitz are Expecting

**Olivia's POV**

My name's Olivia Carolyn Pope-Grant and I'm dying!

No. See, that- that's just a bad introduction. I'm not really dying but it feel pretty close right now. We're gonna try this again and I'm gonna try to be a little less dramatic.

My name is Olivia Carolyn Pope-Grant. I've got a million problems and one man is the source of all of it.

Fitzgerald Thomas Mighty-dick Grant The Third.

Oh, I curse the day that man was born. I curse the first day I met him on that playground at recess in third grade. I curse the day he kissed my lips so damn sweet and made me fall blindly in love with him when we were thirteen. I curse the day he slid between my thighs and took me to heaven because I haven't been able to look back ever since. He fucking ruined me and I'm about the size of a whale at the moment.

Now laying on a pile of fluffy pillows behind my back in excruitiating pain with a stomach the size of the goddamn watermelon, I can't help but wonder how the fuck I'd gotten in the situation I found myself in.

I refuse to blame myself. That night was too good for any blaming but goddamn it, I need someone to blame and it might as well be that dumbass husband of mine. You see, it was one of those nights- after an eighty hour week and way too many glasses of wine, I looked into that man's eyes and like a bitch in heat, I jumped him and ripped his clothes off. It was just pure, raw need and Fitz never being one to refuse me anything ever, picked me up and drilled me against our office walls. Then he did it against twice: on our mahogany work desk. That one was fast and rough. I'd never come harder than I did that night. He was relentless in his pursuit because the next round found me on all four on the floor of our office, his hand wrapped around my throat as he fucked me into oblivion. And God, he did it well. We fucked like animals that night and I might've said I wanted all his babies then.

I spoke that shit into existence and now look at me!

"I WANT DRUGS!" I screamed for the millionth time as a wave of contractions knock the breath out of my lung. "GIVE ME DRUGS!" It's been like this for the past three hours and I swear, that baby is just as stubborn as the both of us already because it refuses to come out into the world.

Labor ain't fun. I'm never having sex again. I'm gonna tell Fitz that it's written, it's law and I've sworn it off cause I don't ever wanna risk going through _this_ again. Just then, I feel another wave that has me arching my back off the bed and blowing off my lungs. I swear to God if I have to endure more of this for another minute, I might just murder somebody. Preferably my husband. Shaking my head, I moan in distress. I can't kill him because if I kill him, our baby will have no parents and I already love that little ass kicker too much to put it through that.

I grabbed Fitz's hand in a death grip and squeezed hard. "Make it stop, baby. MAKE IT STOP!" I begged him.

He looked back at me with those beautiful blue eyes and for some reason, he looked more in pain that I am. He kissed my forehead and rubbed his big, warm hands on my watermelon sized stomach. A little wave of sadness rushed over me as I realize that it's the last time he'll get to do this small intimate gesture before the baby comes. Though I'm currently all kinds of annoyed and in pain, I can't say that I won't miss being pregnant. For my first, as far as pregnancies went, mine was a great one and I've had nine months to get accustomed to this watermelon sized stomach I'm complaining about now.

As if Fitz could tell exactly what I was thinking about, he kissed my forehead and rubbed his hands on my stomach again. It's almost soothing until another contraction hits me and tear coat the corners of my eyes. Mother of all cunts! I don't know how women do it!

My husband always trying to be the best human being offers me a sympathetic smile and reassures me: "Soon Mama. The nurse said she was gonna come back in a few minutes and she will."

A few minutes was about an hour ago to me. I want names and I want everybody in this hospital fired! If I wasn't in so much pain, I would fight all of them my damn self!

 _"GAAAAAAAAAH! Mother fucker!"_

I didn't want to be one of those annoying patients, but today, I was exactly that. I pressed the alert button next to me an obnoxious amount of time because I can't take it anymore. I want those damn drugs and I want them right goddamn now!

…

 **Fitz's POV**

See that bouncy haired, beautiful bombshell on the bed? See her? Yeah, that's my wife. I promise, she's usually nicer when she's not acting like a raging drug addict going through widrawals. Although, I'll be the first to admit that she deserves a break. She's having my baby.

Oh, where the hell are my manners? My name's Fitzgerald Grant and I'm the idiot that knocked her up.

I'm grinning like the idiot I am as I say this. My girl's having my baby and I'm not ready. At least I don't think I should be. I've never done this whole dad thing before but for one reason or another I'm not freaking out like you might think I should be because in this very exact moment, I feel like I was born to witness this day. I've waited nine glorious months to welcome that little sucker into our lives and now that the time has come, I'm exhaustingly impatient. I'm just ready to see his or her face and feel like a whole new different person.

A growling roar from my wife's lips followed by the crushing pressure on my hand brought me back from whatever sappy Disney land world I'd escaped to momentarily. My brows clench together and my nose scrunch up in a pained grimace.

"Oww!" I mumble under my breath.

Olivia flips. Her teeth are gritting and she's seething. "Suck it up! You did this to me!" She barks.

First she's sour, then she's sweet. That's my Livvie for you and I can't even say I'm mad at her for it.

"Yes. Yes I did." I grin as I lean down to kiss her forehead one more time.

Am I just a cynical son of a bitch for being happy about this pain that my wife is currently in? Wait. No. Phrased like this, I'll admit that I do kind of sound like an asshole.

Alright, what I meant to say was that after she works through this pain, something life changing and beautiful is gonna happen. We're gonna be holding a baby- a living, breathing human being that we both created together out of love and passion and he or she is gonna be a mixture of the both of us . That baby's gonna be ours and I think if it requires a little bit of pain to get there, it's kind of worth it, right?

Ah, God! Just thinking about that moment nearing has me wanting to curl up on the floor and weep of joy like a vagina!

But you see, you can't fault me for feeling this way. Liv's very career driven and I love and respect that about her. It's one of the trillion reasons why I love her so damn much. I never wanted her to see having my children as a sacrifice she had to make in order keep me happy in our marriage because it wasn't and I also never wanted her to feel like she wasn't enough for me because she is. So for a long time, I never thought that children were in the cards for me and Olivia. Then six years down the road, (our marriage as strong as ever) I started telling myself that I was okay with the idea of never knowing what it feels like to have something in the world you love more than anything. After all, Liv and I, we lived a fast life. We work excruciatingly long hours and there was no way bringing children into our world would work. I'd given myself every single excuse in the book to make myself believe that it was for the best, but at the end of the day; they were just that. Excuses. Deep down, I think Liv always knew that I was in denial and I didn't care because I thought that my being selfless was the right thing to do. But my God was I wrong because I can't even begin to tell you the joy that filled me up when Liv told me I knocked her up. Till the day I'm buried six feet under, I don't think I'll ever forget that day.

 _ **Flashback:**_

 _Olivia's definitely not one of those women who find creative ways to reveal life changing news. She's a straight shooter, that woman. I'm talking about dick swinging all up in your face kind of honesty. She tells it like it is. She's all about the truth and sugarcoats nothing, not even to spare your feelings which is why, if you want an honest opinion out of her on anything, brace yourself with a bullet proof suit._

 _It's a Thursday night and I come home to find my very busy, workaholic wife home before me. Huge fucking deal because as the CEO of Olivia Pope & Associates and the most recommended Fixer in the Big Apple, Olivia works excruciatingly long hours and even when she's not at work, she's __**at work**_ _because her phone is a hotline that never stops ringing. Once the gladiator suit is on, she's a force to be reckoned with and I'm damn proud of her cause my baby slays at what she does. Period._

 _So anyways, back to my story._

 _It's a Thursday night, barely ten o'clock and there's my wife home before me in pajamas pacing a fucking hole in our kitchen floor. On sight, I know something's not right. She's on full freaking out mode and I try my best not to jump the gun and go to my grave sooner than I intend to. Slowly, I take in our surroundings as I peel off my jacket and roll up my sleeves and then, it kind of goes quiet for a moment because she stopped pacing just long enough as an acknowledgement to my presence in the room._

 _"Hi." I greeted._

 _That's our thing. "Hi" and depends on how it's delivered from either one of us, we just know when things aren't alright or when they're just peachy. It works both ways. Except tonight. For the first time in over twenty years of knowing Olivia, I don't know which one tonight's "Hi" is coming from her when she replied back._

 _"Livvie…" I proceeded with caution._

 _She doesn't look at me. Instead, she turns her full attention to a glass of wine sitting on the counter that's filled to the brim, almost spilling over._

 _Shit!- I thought.- Somebody died._

 _"Baby, what's wrong?" I asked._

 _This time, I unbuttoned a few buttons on my shirt and loosened up my tie just in case I start shitting bricks when she finally tells me what the problem is. But still, she continued to ignore me and instead kept staring at the glass of wine as if it held the secret cure to cancer._

 _Shit! I repeat in my head. At this point, I'm barely keeping my shit together because she's scaring me. This is bad. This is really bad!- It's the only mantra in my head at the moment and it keeps playing like a broken record._

 _My feet must've grown minds of their own because suddenly, I find myself closer to Liv with hands up trying not to startle her while working my best to get to the root of whatever's going on._

 _"Livvie, baby… listen to me. Whatever it is, it's all gonna be alright cause I got you, Mama. You just tell me what you need and If I have to commit a few murders here and there to get it for you, I will. I promise I will. Just tell me what you need." As her husband, I feel it's my job to hold down the fort and be strong for her while she can't be. I know it's my duty to slay the dragons, strangle the monsters and tell her that everything is going to be alright even if they won't be. But at this point, I've got nothing to go on because I don't know what the hell is going on yet. I'm just talking out of my ass._

 _Then, after what seemed to have been an eternity later, Olivia finally mumbled something under her breath. I barely hear her so I have to ask her to repeat for me again._

 _"I can't drink wine anymore." She said miserably._

 _Okay. Yep. That's serious._

 _For those of y'all who don't really know my wife, here's a little "get to know her" lesson. Olivia is a wine lover. It's all she drinks with the exception of a little bit of Chardonnay on occasion but almost always, she's a wine drinker. She's an expert in wine so her not being able to drink wine anymore is a big deal but still, I can't help but release a breath of relief. I hadn't even realized how much of a sweat I'd worked off as I braced myself for the worst._

 _Silly little woman! If it's a conscious decision, I don't see what the big tragedy is though because I'm just assuming it's one of those things; like she's going on a diet or something and she's backing off the wine. I open my mouth to tell her to chin up or that I'd go off one of my guilty pleasure and do this cleansing shit with her too but she cuts me off._

 _"…or Shushi." She said. "I've never liked it to begin with, but still, it's definitely on the list of the many things I won't be able to consume." She started pacing again while I tried to catch up._

 _I shake my head from side to side. There's a fucking list? I huffed. I'm still trynna work it out in my head while also thinking about the stuff I'm gonna have to give up if she gives it up too._

 _"Can't have coffee either."_

 _Hunh? Now I'm starting to sense a pattern. There's a clog in my brain that won't allow me to figure out what it is quite yet but I know there's a pattern. It's probably because I rely on coffee to feel human every single morning and the thought of having to give it up for a stupid cleanse sounds insane. But I still don't think that's it. My guts says there's a pattern and I should try to figure it out. I'm not that much of an idiot. Only sometimes when I forget to put the toilet seat down but for the most part, I'm pretty smart. I'd like to think so. I'll figure it out. But I don't get the chance to because next I hear; "We're gonna have to move."_

 _Okay. That's when I pop off because hell no! No to the power of N-O! What the hell? No._

 _I love this house. It's one of the very first things Liv and I invested in together financially. We basically built this house together from the ground up. It did take us about eighteen months of late nights, fucking up and getting it right, eating Chinese food and drinking cheap beer or expensive wine, depending on what the night called for. We both pitched in and made it something we were both proud to call home. I even have a badass man-cave and I didn't have to fight Liv on it. If you ask me, it was one of the many greatest things we worked on together._

 _No, if not for the man-cave then for the memories because during those eighteen months, we shared some of the best memories together that I treasure close to my heart. This house has witness way too many sessions of hot sex between me and Liv for me to just fold on it without a fight. I'm planting my foot down and I won't budge until I win this round. I may not practice Law in a court room anymore seeing as though I'm the Governor of New York but I did go to Harvard and baby, believe it, I'm a closer._

 _I scratch my brows and clear my throat in an effort to not come off as passive aggressive because while I'm willing to advocate for this house, I'm also aware that my wife has one hell of a right hand and she ain't afraid to slap me into another nationality if I cross a line._

 _And just like a coach prepping his team for the football match of the century, I give myself a mental pep talk: Okay. Deep breath. Just try to get your point across without sounding like an asshole. You got this!_

 _"This house is perfect, Livvie." I said. "Why are you talking about moving?"_

 _She stopped pacing and gave me the most serious "what the fuck, dude?" face of the century like I'm supposed to know why we're moving when she hasn't even clued me in on anything as of yet and I stare right back at her with the best "suck my dick!" face I've got cause I'm an idiot and I'll risk the right hand._

 _"We have to move because we're gonna need more room." She replied._

 _I can tell the exact moment she put that gladiator suit on and turned into full fixer mode on me. Even after all these years, it still fascinates me how she can just blink or snap her fingers and say a few words and get shit done. I almost hand her the winning crown myself and help her load the big ass truck to our next destination but I close my eyes for a moment and I see the for sale sign on our lawn and our home, the one we built up together go to some stranger who has no idea of the value of it and I snapped out of it. I'm not going down without a fight. No siree, not this time._

 _"Why?" I asked. "Unless we're suddenly adopting a squad of Golden Retrievers and Beagles I don't know about, I don't think we're gonna 'need more room'." I said all in good humor._

 _And for a second, I swear to God, I had it. I'd won. We weren't moving for no stupid reason. I could compromise with a renovation/remodeling even if was gonna cost us a shit ton of money if that's what she really wanted, but still, I'd won. We wouldn't be going through the hassle and the stress of looking for a place to make our new home. I'd won!_

 _I was in the middle of my victory dance mentally when suddenly, the most terrifying thing to me happened. Liv burst into tears. I wiped the dumbass smirk that started to form on my lips with the quickness. After, I just stood frozen in place like a cripple because my wife is crying. Like legit tears are running down her beautiful face and it isn't a fucking prank. Just to make sure it wasn't, I look around the house for hidden cameras or some scrawny looking dude with a megawatt smile to come out of nowhere and tell me I'm being punk'ed. And I'll be honest, for a minute there, I waited for that scenario to play out because then, I could punch that idiot in the face and serve Liv a big cup of "Screw You" for scaring me. I waited and that moment never came. Instead, I got more tears and a hysterical wife._

 _What the fuck?!_

 _"Liv, baby. I'm sorry." I begin to say. "Look, I'm an idiot, okay? We'll move and adopt all the puppies in the world if that's what you want, okay? But you gotta stop crying, Mama. Just… please stop crying." That's it. It only takes one drop of tears for me to cower and let her win. Ain't nothing more to it. She got tears in her eyes. Fuck the house._

 _I can handle a lot of shit that this life has thrown at me and still yet has to throw at me. I can take it all in with a panty-dropping smile and a sexy stride, no problem. And I got receipt to prove it. I fought a terrible flu once that had come to take me to my grave. No bullshit, I thought my days were numbered when that shit put me in a bed for a full week. And even though it turned me into the biggest bitch baby you could ever imagine, I rose back up and drop kicked that flu's ass where the sun don't shine. Then again, there was that other time I fought a three hundred pounds hillbilly on steroids at a bar and I won even though I walked out with more than a couple cracked ribs and literally couldn't walk straight without limping or the help of a stick for a whole month. Fuck, I rode a mean bull at a rodeo in Texas once too. That bull was the meanest asshole I've ever encountered with in my lifetime for the simple fact that it was a beast. Everybody was afraid of him, and with reasons too, mind you. Every rodeo player that ever rode him are either dead or have never been the same again after riding him. But I took one look in that sonofabitch's eyes in it's cage and decided that he was no match for me. I was gonna ride the fuck out of him if it's the last thing I did and at that point in my life, I was pretty arrogant and didn't care whether I lived or died. I was too busy hitting rock bottom for that. But yes, I rode that bull and did it in front of fifty thousand people on a Saturday afternoon in Austin, Texas for thirty glorious seconds until it threw me fifty feet off my ass and tried to pummel me afterwards. I once again walked away with a little more than a few cracked ribs and a severe concussion that nearly damn gave Olivia a heart attack that day._

 _Anyways, the point is, I can fucking handle pretty much anything. I'm a real man in that sense but when it comes to Olivia hurting or crying, I can't! She's my baby. She's the dearest thing in this beautifully messed-up world to me and if I could help it, she would have never known what pain is._

 _"You don't understand!" She yelled._

 _I'm calm as a lamb but only cause I have to be. She's having some kind of breakdown and I don't think that going off on her too would make the situation any better so I'm calm because I know that she needs me to be._

 _Quietly, I take one more step towards her until she's in my arms. She doesn't fight me off. Instead, she just melts into my arms and begin sobbing against my chest while my heart continued to break._

 _I can't wrap my head around it even as I try to soothe her by whispering sweet-nothings in her ears, running my fingers through her hair and my hands up and down her back. She's a mess and I just can't deal. The sight of her crying just doesn't… it doesn't settle well with me. It makes me see red because Liv doesn't just lose it._

 _This is the same girl who punched me in the face in third grade on the playground when I dared to make fun of her glasses simply because I was too idiotic even then to come out right and tell her that I liked her. Liv is also the same girl that broke into a roller skating rink with me at the crack of dawn to smoke weed because she knew I was working some shit out and needed her. We were just fifteen years old then and she knew what getting caught could do to her good girl posture, but still, she did it for me. She's also the only person on this planet that I can always count on to give me a good ass kicking when I'm in desperate need of it. Even when I broke her heart seven ways till Sunday when we were nineteen years old and decided to go our separate ways after that, she's the girl that still showed up and saved me from myself after the death of my mother. Liv is also the only girl in the world I know who can destroy somebody's whole entire existence in a matter of seconds with just barely few eloquently spoken words, if you cross her or bring harm to anyone she cares about. She can pour the fear of God into the toughest son of a bitch to ever live and this isn't me propping her up because she's my wife. Nope. I've seen that shit happen and quite frankly it scared me too. But even if all the above weren't true, this one is: This woman is the same girl that's put up with my annoying ass for my entire life and still agreed to a lifetime of everything good and bad with me. For richer, for poorer. In sickness and in health. Till death do us part. She agreed to that with me and a woman like that doesn't just cry for no reason. That's fact and I'm happy to sign off on that statement._

 _A few minutes later, she stopped crying and shoved at my chest but I refuse to let her go. I want to take away all the pain._

 _"Let me go." She said, voice clear._

 _I shook my head. "Shut up." I say, tightening my arms around her._

 _She groaned and attempted to shove me off and escape again but to no avail. So she grew frustrated. "I swear to God, Fitzgerald-"_

 _I snapped because I'm kind of fucking pissed off. She's in no position to threaten me with nothing because she was just crying. Like straight up wailing and sobbing against my chest and I know for a fact that I'm gonna have nightmares about those sounds later. I'm pissed off because she expects me to just let it go like she didn't just scare me to death._

 _I pushed back far enough so she could see my face and understand that I don't give two anal fucks about her empty threats. Even with dilated lids, puffy brown eyes and dried tears stains on her cheeks, it still blows me away how effortless it is for her to be a Goddess._

 _I want to kiss those swollen lips of hers and take away the pain the best and only way I know how. I wanna take her to bed and make sweet-sweet love to her until she gets it through that thick fucking brilliant brain of hers that I'm here to stay and that I'm not going anywhere._

 _But I'm pissed off and I'm not thinking with the right head. So I regroup. I brought a hand to her face and wiped away the drying tears. My feet are planted solid on the floor and my eyes are the color of steel gray._

 _"Don't fuck with me, Olivia." My voice is firm even though I know that she could literally kill me in our kitchen and get away with it for speaking to her so foully._

 _I also know that she knows I'm being serious. Yes, I'm pussy whipped. I admit to it proudly, but that fact doesn't strip me off my backbone and Liv doesn't feel the need to emasculate me about it every second of every day. Once I get into Alpha mode, she submits and lets me settle into my role as her man - no muss, no fuss. I know that she knows with the utmost certainty from the look in my eyes that neither one of us are leaving this kitchen tonight until I get some kind of explanation for what the hell just happened._

 _So she blew out a breath and straightened her back before she looked into my eyes. "We need a bigger house with larger spacing and a backyard. I want it to have it's own room and a playroom also so we can spend time together as a_ _ **family**_ _. Babies need things Fitz and I want ours to have everything! I want_ _ **our baby**_ _to have the happiest childhood… the happiest life."_

 _I'm watching Liv's mouth move. I can hear her voice sounding in my ears but I can't bring myself to really pay attention to her because sometime in between this conversation, I spaced out and only one thing keeps echoing in my head:_ _ **Our baby.**_ _I repeat it several times in my head and each time, the echoing gets louder._ _ **Our baby. Our baby. Our baby. My baby.**_ _I'm almost deaf by the time the echo stops and that's when I finally got it because that's when it finally registered: me, Liv, and a baby._ _ **Family.**_

 _I feel everything all at once and the feeling is so overwhelming. I start vibrating and I feel it all the way down to the last fiber of my bones. My heart starts to pump in my chest overtime and the adrenaline rushing through my arteries makes it feel as if it's just gonna pop out of my chest at any given second. My marathon winning legs get weak and suddenly, I'm on my fucking knees and I hear a choir of angels belting out the most amazing lyrics on repeat: You're having a fucking baby! Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit, congrats!_

 _I feel wetness in my eyes and when I look up at Liv down on my knees, I find her staring back down at me, shaking her head. It's almost déjà vu._

 _"Don't you dare cry on me, Fitzgerald." She threatened._

 _Whoops! Too late. The tears are rolling down in waves and I can't stop them and I don't want to. "Livvie…" I whispered._

 _"Damn you, Fitz!" And then she's crying again. This time they're not terrifying tears. They're joyful tears and I'm okay with that because we're both a damn mess together. My face is literally splitting in half from happiness and I can't help but hug her waist and bury my face under her shirt._

 _I can't see anything yet. Her stomach is still rock hard and toned. There's no indication that there's a baby growing inside of her but just knowing that there is one is enough for me. I don't even know it yet but I'm already in love with that kid. There's a flame burning in the pit of my stomach and I don't think I've ever felt anything like it in my whole entire life. I'm so happy that I'm half tempted to ask this woman to marry me all over again because shit, I can't believe it. I'm gonna be a father! I press my lips against Olivia's stomach and pray to God that this is real._

 _I pulled away just for a second to stare up at Liv again and I'm blown to smithereens with how staggeringly beautiful she is. I bring a hand to cup at my jaw as another wave of tears rolls down my face. Holy shit! I'm also grinning like a damn fool but I can't bring myself to stop that either. "A baby…?"_

 _One hand wound fingers through my thick raven curls as the other wipe away my tears. And when my wife leaned down to kiss my lips, she wore a smile. "Yeah. You knocked me up." She murmured. "Congratulations, daddy."_

 _And I guess she knew then that she was happy with that reality because I was over the moon about it. When she's okay, I'm okay. And when I am, she is too. It kind of works both ways._

…

 _A little while later, we lay in our comfy bed cuddling. The wide flatscreen TV against our wall streamed a late marathon of The Office that neither one of us seemed to be paying much attention to._

 _I crossed my legs over Liv's thighs under the covers and sighed deeply as I bury my face deeper between her breasts. As usual, she smells delicious. The perfect combination of sweet and savory filled my senses and I can't help the sudden urge to slip in between her thighs and fuck her senseless until the only thing she knows and feels is me and me alone._

 _But one thought stops be from doing just that. Over the past two-something hours, Liv's stomach had easily become my favorite part of her body. It's also very ironic how that happened so quick because I'm a pussy man first and then, I'm an ass man._

 _More hilarious is Liv taking ten pregnancy tests because apparently three wasn't enough. She had to make certain that this was indeed real and it's only after the eighth positive that she was convinced. And after thrusting all ten of them in my face so I could see what I did to her in a physical form, I made her lie down so I could explore her stomach. Call it creepy but I'm just a man who's happy that he's going to be a father. And Liv was more than willing._

 _I don't think I've ever done anything more productive in my life than stare at my pregnant wife's stomach for a half hour because in that very moment, I was a man obsessed. I stared and touched, hoping to see or feel something; anything and when Liv saw how desperate I was, she started laughing at me._

 _"I won't start to show for a while." She told me. "I'm only five weeks."_

 _Still, I didn't care._

…

 _I cursed under my breath as I rolled on my side of the bed. Instantly, Liv picked up on my changed mood and climbed on top of me, straddling my waist, cowgirl style._

 _"What's wrong with you?" She asked._

 _I shook my head from side-to-side. I don't want to ask her what I know I have to because I might not like the answer she gives me afterwards. And I know too damn well how cowardly of me that is. "Nothing." I replied._

 _But Liv doesn't buy it for one second. I could never lie to that woman because she can smell bullshit like sharks smell blood and this time wasn't any different._

 _She doesn't say anything. She just looked down at me with doe brown eyes and suddenly, she reached for the headboard with one hand while the other took residence flatly on my chest. And then she does this thing with her waist- it's slow and delicious. Up and down, she grinds on my dick and her eyes never waver from mine as she does it. It's torture. The most delicious kind._

 _I groaned in my chest and she bucks down just a little bit harder and a lot slower and I feel my dick rise up like a soldier saluting his Commander in Chief. Aye, Captain!_

 _"What, you think I was born yesterday?" She asked, her rhythm never faltering. She threw her sweet ass back in those perfect little circles and my throat became drier than the Sahara Desert. On top of all that, my dick is so hard, I can't even think straight. "Did you forget how well I know you Fitzgerald?"_

 _Oh no, I sure the fuck haven't forgotten. With her all on my dick like this making me lose the last shreds of my sanity, I know exactly who I'm dealing with and she will make me come seven ways till Sunday just like this until I man up and tell her what's wrong with me._

 _"What's wrong with you?" She asked again._

 _I must be a man of strong will power because I managed to swallow through the dryness in my throat and moan through the movements happening on my dick long enough to answer her. "I don't wanna say."_

 _That doesn't throw her off at all. Instead, she leans down with her eyes still open and suck my lower lip into her mouth. I'm panting like a bitch in heat. My hands are free and I guess I could stop her hips from moving but I don't want to because I wanna burry my cock so deep inside her and fuck her until I don't know where I begin and she ends. I know she won't let me touch her until she makes me spill it out so this, her grinding on my dick is almost a relief as much as it is torture. Hands at my side, I let her have full control because I know once I get my hands on her, I'm gonna flip her on all four, grab a fistful of her hair and fuck her unconscious. And I most definitely will be bruising that luscious ass. So for now, she has the control. She knows me all too well and that's why she's enjoying this so much. I allow her full access of my mouth without a fight and because she finds it too easy, she starves me of the delicious warmth of her tongue. She teased my mouth until I begged and then finally… finally she kisses me and it's everything just as much as it's not enough. Her hips buck as her tongue fucks my mouth. I plead for more. Demanded. And she gives. Our teeth clash, our breath in sync and our tongues are entwined. I take some control by biting on that luscious lower lip of hers and sooth the sting with a lick of my tongue. She smiled against my lips and pulled away. I'm left hanging dry and just when I think she's done with me, she buries her face in the crook of my neck and bites… hard. A breath whooshed out of my lungs as the pain blends in perfectly with the pleasure and I almost snapped but her reflexes are quick and she grabbed my hands just in time and clasped them over my head against the headboard. I think I'm dying. She's gonna kill me. Then she's raining soft little kisses up my neck until she reached the sweet stop behind my ear. Her breath caressed my earlobe and formed goosebumps on my skin that sent an electrifying shudder rushing down my spine. And then she's licking the spot, her tongue going in tune with her circling hips._

 _"I don't give a monkey's left nut about what you don't wanna say." She whispers in my ear._

 _See, that right there is Olivia Pope in full southern colors. Even though she grew up in the city, my girl's a southern country girl from Louisiana. The slapping me into another nationality thing all stem up from the simple fact that she has the balls to do it and if she says she will, she shall. And sometimes, when she's mad enough, that cute little accent is there._

 _I gasped and she pulled away smirking. "Spill it, Grant."_

 _I recognize game when I see it and this round…it goes to her fair and square._

 _She released my hands and climbed off me into a kneeling position and then her sneaky fingers are reaching in my boxers to finish off what she started. But I don't give her the satisfaction because I want her punishment to be just as sweet when I bring her to my knees in just a minute._

 _But first, I got some shit to spill._

 _"Do you not want the baby?" I asked. All of the sudden I'm so vulnerable and my heart rate is speeding off because what I said about not wanting Olivia to think about having my children as a sacrifice is true and if that's not something she wants… if a baby is truly not in the cards for her, I'm gonna have to accept that because even though it would absolutely break my heart, I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I somehow guilt her into having a baby that she doesn't want. "Are you happy about the baby?"_

 _First, I'm met with a look of utter confusion which soon transformed into sadness and then I see anger._

 _Yep, I definitely see red. We went over this already. Sometimes I'm an idiot and y'all are going to have to forgive me several times._

 _"Is that a serious question, Fitz?" She replied._

 _I nodded. Yes it's a serious question. Otherwise, why would I bother asking it? "You asked what was wrong and this is it." I told her. "Is this something you really want?"_

 _"Why wouldn't it be?" She's not exactly answering me with a definitive 'yes' or a conclusive 'no' and with every second that goes by, I feel my stomach drop further to China._

 _"Because you love your job." My answer came with a shrug._

 _Liv smiled. "I do love my job." She replied. "But I love you more, you idiot. Ain't nothing more to it. I'd be lying to you if I said that the reason I lost it a little bit earlier wasn't because I was scared._ _ **I'm fucking terrified**_ _! Terrified that I will fuck this kid up, terrified that I won't be the mother that it deserves because I work so damn much, terrified that I won't know how to do any of this. But none of that's got nothin' to do with me not wanting it, alright?"_

 _My heart is still drumming in my chest but relief found me after her statement. With a nod, I smiled back at her. "I'll be there, y'know that right?"_

 _"I know." She grinned. "We made a baby together, Fitz!" She suddenly exclaimed as if it just registered for her too. "A human being… that… that's…"_

 _And that's when I saw it on her face. She wants my baby. She wants our baby and there was never any doubt about it. I see the terror that she talked about under the surface but beneath that, is also so much happiness._

 _"C'mere." I beckoned._

 _She climbed back on top of me and straddled my waist. She looked down at me and the glow on her face is so evident as she stroked my stubbly face. Leaning down, she started raining soft little kisses across my face, down my jaw, my neck until she worked her way up to my ears. "I. Want. Your. Baby."_

 _That was music to my ears. All my worries- erased. I was just happy and I still had one raging boner._

 _"Kiss me." She does and I dip my hands inside her panties to palm her luscious ass. I moan in her mouth, her tongue having me ready to confess and agree to everything she might ask. I squeeze her ass and push her soaked pussy down on my hard dick._

 _"Ah…" She gasped and dug her fingers through the blade of my collarbone. "Fuck! Take it off and fuck me."_

 _I grab a fistful of her hair and we break the kiss. We're both breathless and so aroused. Her brown eyes are now a stunning café noir glowing with lust and desire. All for me and my God, she's gorgeous. I'm all over her again in seconds, my mouth drinking from her delicious, swollen lips as I sit up on the bed with her. Her mile-long legs are wrapped around my waist and she threw her head back as I kiss my way down her neck._

 _"Fitz…" She hissed._

 _I hear the desperation; the wanting in her voice and because I'm a smug asshole, I can't help how pleased it makes me feel as I dig my teeth into the pulse of her neck. In response, I'm rewarded with an incredible sound. It's a mixture of a gasp and a whimper followed by a groaned, "fuck." She's completely surrendered and at my mercy to do with her whatever I please and with that in my mind, I take the opportunity to flip us over- her beneath me and me on top of her looking into her stunned eyes._

 _"Hi." I whisper._

 _"Hi." She smiled, her fingers going through my hair as our lips meet again. "Fuck me."_

 _I laughed at how forward she gets when she becomes impatient. I stroke her hair and peck her cute little nose. "I have every intention of fucking you, sweetheart." I tell her. "But first, my tongue has a close up, one-on-one with that sweet pussy of yours."_

 _My teeth had barely grazed the apex of her thigh when she grabbed my pillow and pressed it over her face. It's needless to say that neither of us got much sleep until the wee hour of dawn. We had a marathon of fucking, making love, fucking again and then some. We fell asleep spent, and sated. Entwined in each other, we were closer and happier than we've ever been._

 _We were having a baby. It didn't get anymore perfect than that._


	2. In Which Olivia is Summoned To Vermont

**Hello!**

 **So this is an old prompt. Some of you might've seen it as one of my tumblr post, but still, I thought I'd repost it as one of the one-shots for those of y'all who haven't had the chance to read it. I've never been entirely sure when this one takes place but I know it's sometime after the Liv-nap. Anyhow, I hope y'all enjoy it.**

 **888**

As the chopper landed on the green grass, Olivia furiously stomped towards the beautiful house that stood before her. The wind blew her long hair as the sound of the chopper moved into distance. Secret service agents guarded the perimeter of the house as the most powerful man in the planet was residing in it currently.

"Where is he?" Olivia stopped before the broad, serious secret agent.

"The president is waiting for you inside Ms. Pope."

With a nod, she thanked the agent and easily slid easily through the glass door that led inside the house.

Stepping in, a rush of nostalgia hit Olivia as she remembered the last time she was here. She glanced down at her feet as the episodes of their night together flashed behind her lids. It all seemed like ages ago.

But they were ever as vivid.

She scrutinized the place with her brown eyes, taking in the changes that's been made unbeknownst to her since then.

Even though the dream still felt and seemed so far away, the house was furnished and it was warm and homey and everything she knows she wants. Vermont. Jam. Kids. Fitz. The dream is always in the back of her mind. Some days, she wanted that dream- that fantasy more than anything. Some days, it's the only reason why she bothered waking up in the morning. Especially lately.

"I started buying decorations when you said there was hope. Thought I'd leave the creative part to you since women seems to know best about that kind of stuff." His smooth baritone voice startled her out of her haze and she spun around to see him looking ever so beautiful and irresistible, nursing a glass of scotch.

His blue-grey eyes dark with intensity. Olivia couldn't really tell what was behind them at the moment. Though he looked exhausted, he was still beautiful nonetheless.

"You do not summon me." She finally spoke. "How many times do I have to tell you that?"

He scoffed. "I'm the President of the free world, Olivia. I can do whatever the hell I want."

"Well, I'm not your puppy. You don't just send big scary guys to my doorsteps and expect me to just drop everything and come running. I have a life."

Fitz has heard this speech so many times before, he knew it by heart.

He started walking towards her and Olivia wasn't sure she could handle being so close to him. The last time they were together in a room like this, she barely survived, she was so heart broken.

"This stops tonight." Was his simple reply.

Olivia arched an eyebrow. "What stops tonight?"

"This." Fitz pointedly the distance between them. "This back and forth shit we seem to be quite the expert of. It's time we get off the merry-go-round. The one where I do something stupid and you punish me by distancing yourself from me, running half way across the world to God knows where. It stops tonight. You do not distance yourself from me, Olivia. There's no escaping me."

Olivia scoffed. Half a humorless chuckle escaping her lips, she was so baffled. "Does Mellie know you're here?" She asked.

It was a cheap shot, Olivia knew it. But more than upset, he looked annoyed with her uttering Mellie's name in their home at a time like this.

"Shut up." He just started circling her in that predatory way of his. Olivia never knew what he was going to do when he did that. The anticipation always gave her those mini strokes but she was dying for a simple touch from him. Anything would suffice. Anything but this cold scrutiny.

"Take off your clothes."

 _Déjà vu._

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me." He said. "Take off your clothes. I'm fixing things tonight. I'm fixing us."

"Fitz..."

"Bedroom, now. And take off your clothes. All of it."

This wasn't new territory. Olivia is used to him being a commanding, moody bastard. However this new tone of his, this new coldness, that was new and as terrified as she was, she was turned on.

Olivia couldn't help but chuckle at the sheer irony of it all. Here she was, coming here just to pick a fight with him about continuously being summoned but instead, she was walking towards their bedroom, stripping out of her clothes in her wake.

The bedroom was ridiculously vast. It seemed like every time she sees it, it gets bigger. The closet occupied nearly half the room but the bed was huge. So huge but it looked so comfortable and large, it must've been custom made. The lamps on the nightstand were old and western, but they complimented the room well.

The smell of brown sugar and vanilla candle wax filled the room as the candles wavered, creating a dim light in the room.

Though what caught Olivia by surprise were the things on display on the huge mattress. A rope suspender was hanging rather securely in the ceiling. A long, leather crop, pleather handcuffs, and nipple clamps lay on the covers.

Olivia more than felt when he entered the room because he was standing right behind her. She could feel his hot breath against her neck and it sent a shiver to her core all the way down her toes.

"Did I not make myself clear when I said take off all of it?" He fingered the lacy black thong she wore and snapped the elastic, causing Olivia to gasp at the impact it made on her skin.

Gradually, she turned around to face him.

"Fitz..."

He interrupted her. "In this bedroom tonight, it's Sir, Mr. President, Mr. Grant or Master." He said. "Take your pick."

Olivia swallowed. Where's her loving Fitzgerald and who the heck is this kinky bastard?

"Okay."

She wasn't even sure what she was agreeing to.

"Okay, who?"

Olivia swallowed, looking over his head as she replied. "Okay, Mr. President."

He nodded. "Very well. Now step in front of the ropes."

He moved out of her way and Olivia took two steps in front of the ropes.

"You need a safe word." He said.

"A what?" Olivia whipped her head so fast, she swore she could've snapped her neck.

"A safe word. Tonight I want you to submit to me wholeheartedly. I need you to trust me to pleasure you and take care of you. I want to do things to you I've never really considered doing to you before so you need a safe word. In case I go too far with you tonight." He explained. "You need a safe words that helps pull me back."

 _This is happening._ Olivia thought. _He's not fucking with me. He's a fucking sadist._

That thought shocked her even more.

 _Since when?_

Her and Fitz were no strangers to rough sex. They've been over the edge of that roof too many times to count and it's always been pleasurable but they've never treaded the waters of BDSM in such a proximity. Had he always been that way under the surface and just never really revealed what did it for him? She doubt that was it because Fitz has always been pretty open about what he likes.

Did she ever really satisfy his needs with their vanilla sexual life?

No. Olivia couldn't go there either. Their sexual life could be described as a lot of things but vanilla wasn't it. And she'd be damned if she started to second guess what's always been satisfyingly hot and pleasurable between the two of them.

This was definitely new.

And with this newness came questions that Olivia had to ask herself. If that's what turns him on now, would she be able to accept him and still love him that way? Would she still be attracted to him and love having sex with him?

Her next word would answer all those internal questions.

"Pineapple." She said.

For the first time since she stepped into the house, he gave her a hint of a smile. It didn't light up his whole face and sparkle his blue-grey eyes like diamonds but it was something and she nearly broke down into tears.

When did she become this shell of a woman?

"Pineapple?" He questioned.

Olivia nodded. "I doubt you could continue to do anything hurtful to me while I'm screaming pineapple at you."

"Point taken."

He stepped in front of her and demanded she raised up her arms.

Olivia did so with a racing heart. She watched as he fastened the rope around her wrist and began tying it.

"Pull on it and tell me if it's too tight." He said.

Olivia pulled and shook her head. It wasn't too tight.

Her hands now hung above her head and all 5'4 of her stood in front of him only in her underwear.

It wasn't anything new. Fitz has seen her naked many times before. But something about her being tied up was new. She felt vulnerable and raw and unguarded and submissive.

He had access to every inch of her.

"I haven't been sleeping." He spoke again after a few minutes of just admiring his kinky work. He began unbuttoning his dress shirt. At the first sight of his exposed, beautiful pale chest, Olivia wanted to cry.

She never thought she would miss seeing chest hair and toned muscles so much in her life.

Olivia's fingers tingled to touch him. But she was tied up.

His shirt fell lifeless on the floor and he begin circling her again.

Olivia turned her head, but the touch of leather touching her face tenderly stopped her.

"Look forward."

"Mr. President..."

"You've been putting me on this leash. Refusing to see me, to talk to me and it started way before what happened to you."

She shuttered when the long stick begun to map her beautiful chocolate skin. Down her spine, up her arms, across her ribs.

Her breathing started to elevate.

"You left but there was hope and I was happy to wait." He said, "I would've waited forever but things changed."

Fitz stopped in front of her and dropped to his knees. His hands went at the elastic of her panties and the next thing Olivia knew, they were being stripped down her legs.

She stepped out of them without being told.

He looked back up at her and for the first time since they've been here, he allowed her to read his eyes. Lust and desire filled his eyes and Olivia mirrored that exact same look back at him.

"You're withdrawn from me," He said.

Gone next was her matching lace bra. He trailed a lone finger down her spectrum, admiring her, lighting her skin on fire.

"Please..."

Olivia didn't even know what she was begging for but that touch... Oh, God. It's been so long. She needed more.

"Do you know how I've been feeling? You're the only person in the world that can drive me so insane. I went to war for you. _Literally_." He didn't fail to remind of the reason for the strain in their relationship. "I love you. You own my heart and I would've moved heaven and hell to get you back if that's what was necessary. You don't forgive me for that, I understand and that's perfectly fine with me. But you also do not withdraw from me Olivia."

He flicked her nipples and they stood on point at the contact. She purred his name as he begin to pull and tweak, palming the globes of her perky breasts.

When her nipples became so sensitive she thought she'd come, he picked up the clamps sitting on the large bed and clipped her nipples between them.

Olivia gasped at the contact the cold metal made with her sensitive flesh.

"You can't use sex to punish me." Olivia mumbled.

"I can." Fitz said. "I am. You've been punishing me for months. Not allowing me to be close to you and I think in the process, you've forgotten who you belong to."

Olivia's first thought was that he knew about her sex escapades with Russell The Traitor. But of course he did. The man was the most powerful person on the planet with agents highly skilled and qualified in shadowing and watching people at his beck and call twenty-four-seven.

"I didn't do it to punish you." Olivia told him. "I just needed time. I wanted to feel human again. I think once you've been a participant of a slave auction as the President of the United States' most important prize at two billion dollars, you start to have a whole new perception of the world and how it works." She explained. _"I needed time."_

Never having talked about the kidnapping since it happened, tears started to flood behind her brown eyes.

 _"And I needed you!"_

As selfish as Fitz knew that sounded, he wasn't sorry. The vulnerability in his tone broke Olivia into pieces.

"I get it. You're not the girl that gets saved because you're always fine. You're Olivia Pope. You don't need a knight. And you sure as shit don't need saving. But I needed you! I needed to comfort you. Tend to your needs and wants. Run away with you, if that's what you wanted - be your person. Talk about it, don't talk about it- whatever. _I just wanted to fucking be there!_ But instead, you completely shut me out." His voice cracked and he sounded as if his heart was shattering _"You pushed me away because that's what you know how to do best."_

"I'm sorry."

He stepped closer to her and dropped his lips at her ear. "And what if I told you that I don't believe you?"

The first slap of the crop made contact with her naked behind and she squealed. She registered the painful sting but the drugging pleasure that followed after almost stopped her heart in its beating track.

The next few slaps came just as unexpectedly as the first. Several on her cheeks, between her thighs, across her clit.

Olivia had never experienced anything like it. Her heart was racing, she was on the balls of her feet and wetter than she's ever been in her whole entire life.

She could feel wetness dripping down her legs.

Still behind her, Fitz pulled at the clamps on her nipples, eliciting a loud moan from her.

"Does that turn you on, Olivia? Submitting to me?"

She nodded.

"I'd like an audible answer please."

"Yes, Mr. President." Her voice trembled.

Fitz's hard arousal sat at the crack of her ass and she grind against it. Wanting to feel it pounding- tearing into her flesh and splitting her in half more than anything.

He swatted her for the action anyways even as he groaned in her ears.

"Stop moving." He ordered. "Spread your legs for me."

It was instinct. Her body just reacted without allowing her mind to process the command. Her legs just spread. But apparently, not wide enough because he kicked them open wider.

Just the touch of his talented fingers had her sobbing like a child. Her head thrown on his shoulder, his hand holding a firm grip at her throat, he parted her lips and jammed two fingers in her warm heat. He bit her collarbone when her walls clasped at his long, masculine fingers.

He never missed a beat. Rough thumb massaged her clit as his fingers fucked her, bringing her into oblivion with each stroke. She was so close. She trembled.

"Come, Olivia." His voice a rasp of lust in her ear as he laved at her earlobe.

And she did so, so blissfully. His words of encouragement was her undoing. She came so hard, she thought she'd blacked out. She rode the aftermath of her orgasm against his thick fingers as moans of pure ecstasy rolled off her tongue.

 _So fucking good._

Olivia watched as he brought his fingers to his lips and polished off her juice on his finger. _God bless him._

She'd never seen anything more erotic.

He moaned. "Taste yourself Liv. See how wild you drive me."

Fitz claimed her lips, daring her tongue to come out and play. He demanded she sucked on his tongue as he devoured the loving hell out of her mouth; leaving her utterly breathless.

Olivia didn't even feel him release her from the suspending ropes. She fell limply in his arms as he carried her towards the bed.

She marveled at his beauty as she watched him strip for her. His erection hung hard and proud and she couldn't help but lick her lips. He was a beautiful man and for as long as she lived, Olivia didn't think she would ever get tired of looking at him.

When he climbed between her legs with the pleather handcuffs, Olivia felt both disappointed and excited.

The need to touch him was unbearable but it outweighed the need to pleasure him and obey him.

"They're pleather. They shouldn't leave any marks on your wrists." Fitz told her as he fastened the handcuffs on her wrists against the bed post.

He positioned at her entrance and slowly rubbed the tip of his cock against her clit. That felt addictively delicious.

Olivia moaned. This time, she begged and she knew why. She wanted to feel something other than that aching emptiness. She wanted to be filled with him.

She wanted him buried in her to the hilt and she wanted his orgasms. She wanted him.

 _She needed him._

"Please Mr. President."

"What are your begging for?" Fitz asked.

"Your cock." Olivia swallowed. "Please fuck me. I can't take it anymore. I need you inside me."

"This isn't a punishment anymore, Olivia." He informed her. "This, the anticipation, I'm simply making you wait and teasing you because I can. Although, I have to admit that it's also killing me, because I want to slide inside you so badly."

"Please do." She begged.

He flicked her nipples with a warning. "Behave and listen to me carefully." He commanded. "Jake, Russell, whoever it may be that's getting a turn while I wait out the end of my presidency, you don't belong to them, is that understood?"

Olivia simply nodded. "Yes, Mr. President."

"They may satisfy you for a night or two and that thought alone-" He turned fifty shades of red, the pained look on his face expressing his distress. Even so, he continued, "Knowing some other man has been inside you, it drives me fucking insane but I can't ask you to be faithful because that would be too hypocritical of me. Still, keep in mind, you belong to me." He clarified. "They're just a fuck. That's all. I'm okay with knowing that. They can't and don't do for you what I can because I'm the only man for you. I control you. I own you. _You belong to me_. _Every smile on your lips in the middle of the day, every perverted thought that's ever made you wet or want to fuck, every time you think about coming, every sexual fantasies you've ever had-they're all mine_."

 _God!_

 _Is it possible to die from arousal and anticipation?_ Olivia wondered.

She nodded again like a good girl. "Yes."

"Who do you belong to?" Fitz asked.

"You." Olivia replied. "Only you, Mr. President."

"Don't you ever forget it." Then he buried himself inside her in one full thrust.

Olivia screamed his name into the night. The deliciousness of being filled with all of him, in raw flesh, God, it felt amazing.  
Tears escaped the corners of her eyes, she felt so relieved.

He pulled out slowly only to slide back in just as slowly, burying his whole length and thickness inside her. Stretching her deliciously to the point of no return.

Olivia threw her head back and looked up at the ceiling. Mouth agape.

He wouldn't allow her to look away from him. He grasped her chin in a firm lock, demanding she looked at him.

"Don't ever look away from me when I'm inside you." He said.

Then he started to move, stimulating her clit in slow, controlled thrusts.

"Oh God..."

He leaned down and claimed her lips.

"Olivia..."

"Yes." She gasped heavily.

"I love you."

She didn't doubt he meant it. He's never lied about that. She felt it in his touch, in the way he looks at her all the time like she's more important than the air he needs to breathe. Like she hung the moon and set the sun. Try as she might to push it away- push him away, Olivia continued to feel his love every day in her heart.

He fucked her in earnest with a mission to shatter her into pieces. He fucked her like he owned her. He fucked her like he meant it. He's her King and she belongs to him. Every part of her with no reserve.

"I've had this fantasy about coming on your tits ever since you said there was hope." He murmured against her lips, nibbling at her lower lip, never faltering in his thrusts.

"Why don't you?"

He chuckled. His forehead pressed against hers, he kissed those beautiful pink lips of hers again before he dipped his head and laved at her nipple, giving each breast equal treatment.

"I vowed to myself that the next time I came, it would be inside you and I wouldn't let up for hours." He replied. "But as long as there's still hope, there's time to fulfill that fantasy, isn't that right?" His punishing pace never let up and Olivia watched as the need for release turned his beautiful eyes into this dark, lustful opaque black.

"Come now, Olivia."

She did. She fell apart in his arms and she thought she screamed, but all that came out was a mantra of gratefulness expressed in breathless _'thank yous'_ as she rode out the earth shattering wave of ecstasy.

Soon Fitz followed and as he emptied his seed inside her, his intense gaze never wavered from her face.

It empowered Olivia as much as it took breath away. She hadn't meant to do it, but she realized then that she's ruined him just as much as he's ruined her.

He freed her wrists from the handcuffs before collapsing on the bed next to her. He then tucked her at his side, holding her in a fierce possessive embrace as he stroked her arm.

When Olivia realized her hands were free, she did what she desperately longed to do to him as soon as he stepped in the same room as her.

Her hands trembled as she placed them against his chest, roaming over his soft skin.

He kissed her forehead and whispered softly, "Sweet baby."

Olivia lost it. She buried her face in his chest and just started sobbing. He rubbed her back in soothing circles, and repeatedly kissed her forehead as he whispered sweet-nothing's in her hair.

"I missed you so much." Olivia sniffled.

"I did too." Fitz told her. "You're my Livvie and I'm sorry that you felt like you were alone." He said referring back to the time she screamed that she was all alone and had no one. "You're never alone. I'm always here."

Just like that he was back. Her affectionate lover was back and it both broke and soothed Olivia. She realized that no matter how much she tries to keep him at bay, push him away, he'll always reel her back in. He'll always save her. _He'll always love her_. That meant more to her than she'll ever admit to him.

"Can you ever forgive me, Livvie?" He sounded so sad and vulnerable.

She didn't answer.

"Is there still hope?" He asked.

She didn't say anything for a few minutes. She just pulled the covers over them and snuggled closer against his chest.

The smell of vanilla and brown sugar filled Olivia's nose as she welcomed the sleepy feeling.

"There's hope." She finally replied.

Olivia was nearly asleep before she felt him press another kiss against her forehead. For tonight, her demons were locked away. He was her shield, her protector, her savior and she knew she'd be okay.

"As long as there's hope, we'll be alright." She heard him say through heavy lidded eyes.

And for the first night in months, Olivia looked forward to a dreamless sleep, safely tucked in his arms.

They'll be okay. And he'll make her get some help.


	3. In Which Liv & Fitz Experience Parenting

**Continuation to chapter I**

* * *

 **Olivia's POV**

The last few hours of my pregnancy is what I considered the worst time of my life. At some point during that God awful thirteen hours of labor that I've endured, my whole family unified for me in the most beautiful way. I don't think a hospital had ever been filled up so much that night unless you count the people from the movie Delivery Man starring Vince Vaughn. I had my family, the one I built through relationships that thicker than blood and the extended one that I adopted when I said "I do" to Fitzgerald Grant on that fateful night seven years ago.

Because my name and my husband's carry a lot of weight, I'm on a secluded floor in the hospital at James Madison and literally, my whole entire family is camped out in my room. We ordered enough pizza to cure world hunger in my opinion and I have no shame in admitting that I ate a medium box all by myself. If you're judging me, don't because I don't care. I'm a woman of opportunity. I figured, it's my last few hours as a pregnant woman so while I still can, I'm gonna eat as much as I can because if someone dared to call me fat, I can always blame it on pregnancy weigh gain. That way, you've played yourself and you're the one looking stupid and mean as fuck because no one likes a bully or an asshole. Besides, what the hell do you want from me? It's pizza! Any smart person would make the same choice.

Hours later, my room is still filled with laughter fueled by cruel jokes from a bunch of amazing people with a wicked sense of humor. And it's helping me a lot because all that laughter echoing in head is a welcomed distraction from the pain that's ripping from my uterus and threatening to kill me. I'm surrounded by an obnoxious amount of presence, balloons and flowers. It was like having a second baby shower, only this time, I'm severely annoyed and I feel suffocated by all of it. But I smile because it's the gesture that counts and I do appreciate it all. I'm floored by the support and love I'm shown. I look at it as a priceless gift because in a few hours, when that baby is a part of this world and as real as real can get in the flesh, all these people's asses are gonna be on speed dial on my phone for baby sitting duties. I'm not even fucking around.

Diapers are ridiculously expensive and I don't believe in nannies. I've seen way too many Lifetime movies over the course of my pregnancy, so I know what I'm talking about and to be rudely honest, I don't want some crazy bitch with a sweet smile to infiltrate my house, piss on my property and take what's mine. My family is the one thing I don't play about and where it concerns Fitz specifically if it ever comes down to it, I won't hesitate twice about fucking up a bitch. I will cut a bitch! I said what I said and I'm not taking it back.

…

After what seemed to have been an eternity, it's finally come down to my last hour of labor. A nurse had to come with one of those laundry bins to put all my gifts in it in order to free up some space in the room. At eight centimeters dilated, I'm forced to kick my family out of the room because my baby's coming. He or she is ready to see my face because it's kicking my vagina and I'm not happy if the series of blasphemies and screams escaping my lips are any indication.

"What if there are twins in there?" Fitz asked.

He's an idiot, so I'm sure he thought it was funny but he couldn't have the worst timing because as soon as those words escaped his lips, he wanted to take them back when I unleashed my wrath on him.

"Have you lost your fucking mind, Fitzgerald?" I seethed as I squeezed hard on his hands. Not to hurt him on purpose but because his big headed ass baby thought it was fun to continue kicking my vagina like it's his or her religion. Not to mention the fact that I didn't get my epidural shot because apparently I was already _"too dilated"_ for it to be submitted to me when I got to the hospital-I'm not entirely too pleased at the moment. "Do you have a death wish?" I can barely fathom pushing out one big headed Grant now this fool is talking about two. That's ground for justifiable murder, right? I can kill him and get away with it, correct?

I don't think I realized just how scared I was until my doctor walked in the room with a statoscope around her neck, glasses perched up on her nose and a way entirely too bright smile. I like the woman. Dr. Callahan is a fantastic doctor if I do say so myself, but right now, while I'm in such excruciating pain and she has that stupidly bright smile on her lips, I can't help but want to fight the woman and wipe the smile off her lips. And if you're still judging me, just remember, no one likes a mean asshole. I'm extremely hormonal and in pain! And on that note, kiss my entire ass.

"Hello, Grants." Dr. Callahan greeted.

I'm in the middle of a contraction so I'm sure what I meant for to be a smile looked a lot like a pained grimace. Dr. Callahan offers me a sympathetic look in return as she takes my vitals. I'm pretty certain that my blood pressure is to the roof.

"How are we feeling?" She asked.

I'm in no mood to make small talk and the more and more my doctor speaks as opposed to working on getting that baby out of me as fast as possible without inflicting any pain on me, the more I wanna punch the woman in the throat. Then again, I had to take a long deep breath as sweat start to bead on my forehead. I had to remind myself that this woman didn't do this me. Fitzgerald Thomas Mighty-dick Grant the Third was responsible for the mess that I currently was.

"I'm feeling absolutely great." I replied sarcastically. "Get this damn baby out of me!"

Dr. Callahan laughed. She's not making it very hard for me to not punch her at all. "You're almost there." She said. Then she turns to Fitz who was smiling like a damn idiot. I wanted to punch him too. "How's dad feeling?"

His palms get suddenly sweaty and I can hear his heartbeat thumping in my ear. He's gonna have a damn heart attack if he doesn't calm the fuck down. I can tell that he's finally getting nervous and it's not helping. I think I liked it better when he was all excited and laid back about the whole thing because then, it meant that at least one of us knew what the hell we were gonna do with a new born baby. But silly me, right? We've never done this before! We're both new at this parent thing!

Holy shit!

We're in deep fuckery.

"Olivia, breathe for me, honey." Dr. Callahan takes a soothing tone with me.

Fitz's arms is instantly at my back as he mimics one of the breathing techniques we learned in our childbirth preparation class. One of the many things I loved about my pregnancy is that Fitz was very engaged. He was the perfect husband to me throughout my entire pregnancy and that's why I can't really murder him at this very moment. He was present for every single doctor appointment, he went to every single class, he read every single book and he indulged my ridiculous cravings with glee. And when I threw my hormonal, insecure fits, he never got upset with me. He didn't dismiss my insecurities when I couldn't fit into my favorite pair of jeans. Instead, you know what he did? I'll tell you what he did. He grabbed my hand, took me to a full sized mirror, stood behind me and made me stare at myself as he told me how beautiful I looked. And then to prove just how true his words were when I worried I wouldn't turn him on anymore because I was a disgusting mess- (and I mean really disgusting,) he bend me over our bathroom sink and rearranged my internal organs with deep thrusts, smacking my ass and pulling my hair until he brought me the greatest release and satisfaction. It was heavenly.

So I can't hate him. Not even if I wanted to because he's been nothing short of amazing to me, to this baby and I had no doubt in my mind that he was gonna an incredible father.

"I'm scared!" I turned to Fitz and burst into tears. "I'm so fucking scared."

He smiled at me with watery eyes before kissing my forehead. "Good." He said. "We're scared together."

You know what? Fuck him!

I hated him for doing this to me, but God, do I love him!

…

Twenty minutes later, I promise you as God is my only witness, I didn't feel the same way!

I wanted to strangle Fitzgerald Thomas Grant.

"Olivia, that baby's not waiting another second. You need to push." Dr. Callahan said as she admitted gloves to her hands.

I shook my head from side to side as if I had a fucking choice in the matter. Like I could just snap my fingers and decide that, that little sucker can go back in there for nine more months because to hell with giving birth. No sir! If only. The next contraction that hits me fully solidifies that I have absolutely no choice in the matter. This baby is coming whether I want it to or not.

"You're crowning, Olivia! Come on, push!"

The next few minutes are a complete blur to me. I see nothing. Every back ground noise is deaf to my ears but I feel everything. It's like I'm in a trance, stuck in a moment of permanent pain unknown to human kind and time has no meaning. All I keep thinking is that I didn't sign up for this shit as my guts are being ripped from within me.

People tell you how beautiful having a child is. They talk about the immeasurable joy that comes with having a brand new baby in your arms. They go on and on about how this world suddenly becomes this magical and wonderful place to be a part of after having a baby. They sell that possible reality to you in a beautiful box with a nice red bow on top of it so that's it's everything that you want.

Well, people are dirty mother fucking liars!

What they don't tell you comes with this beautiful box with the nice red bow is the all the pain. What they don't make you privy to is all the agony that literally splits you in half, chews in and spits you out. What they don't mention is all the emotions that overwhelm you and threaten to drain you of all your energy while trying to push out a full sized human being out of your vagina.

Jesus.

H.

Roosevelt, Christ!

"I can't…" I'm not myself. To me, this almost feels like an out of body experience. Like I'm just watching all of this happen. But I feel everything with the same intensity as well. "I can't anymore." I feel drained and I truly don't want to do it anymore.

"Yes you can!" Fitz barked.

I shook my head. At this point, I can't even differentiate which are my tears or sweat. "I'm dying, Fitz." I said.

"No you're not!" He cried.

"Don't patronize me. It's okay." I almost make peace with the fact that I'm really dying and the bitch of it is that I believe it. "Just promise me you won't let our child become a drunk or a slut, okay?"

I don't know what's funny but Fitz is laughing. He cups my face in his hand and press his forehead against mine as he looked into my eyes. "Olivia Pope…" I start smiling too despite all the pain because I know whatever speech he's going to give me right now is gonna be one for the books. Fitz doesn't like to call me Olivia Pope. Not since we got married but every once in a while, when I really need one of those Rocky-before-the-fight speeches, he'll get into the role of a sensei. He'll dress me up in armor, hand me my sword, kiss my lips and send me to battle like the gladiator that I am, knowing that I'm fully prepared. I was just in need of the little push. And right now, in this scenario, nothing is different. He's being by my side-my person for the umpteenth time. "You're the strongest, most badass, beautiful woman I've ever known. Don't tell me you can't, baby. You can and you will." With that, he kisses my lips like always before climbing behind me on the bed. His legs go on either side of my waist and then I hear his voice in my ears guiding me through it.

"If I survive this and you so much as think about touching me again, I'll castrate you, Fitzgerald!"

He laughs but he doesn't know how fucking serious I am. "Okay."

…

The world is blank and soundless once it's all done and over with. I feel peace, I feel relief and that's all good. But I don't feel that burst of happiness until I hear his voice. There's a quiet hum before I hear it. It's soothing and then a beat later, it just sounded like the most catastrophic, chaotic sound when his deafening cries fill my ears and it's the best sound in the world to me. I know in that very instant what I just endured was a walk in the park once I've been blessed with the sound of his voice… and when he's placed in my arms, I know I could spend the rest of my life doing this again a thousand times a day. In a heartbeat.

Born just seconds ago, he's brand new, he's captivating, he's unreal. He's perfect.

As soon as he's placed in my arms, his cries subside as if he knows he's reached home, My breath is knocked out of my lungs and I can't help but stare. Laid there in my open arms blissfully unaware, untainted, and perfect, I couldn't believe that this beautiful, flawless little human being is a product of me and my husband. _He's mine_. _**He's ours**_ _._ _ **Really ours**_ _. Damn, God is good!_

I count ten little fingers and ten little toes and when I touched his skin, my fingers tingled with the softness I'm met with. Then the most amazing thing happened to me. Just as he begins to fall asleep, he grasped my finger with his entire little hand as if he knows who I am to him already and he feels completely safe with me. Suddenly, my world as I knew it before completely shifted as this little boy crawled his way into my heart. I'd fallen in love with another Grant and as blissful, joyful tear fill my eyes, I leaned down and pressed a gentle kiss on my baby's head.

Our hearts started to beat as one. I hear it. I feel it. And everything's right with the world. Everything is changed. It's also then that I whispered a promise into my son's ears. A promise to love him infinitely; a promise to protect him from all evil infinitely; a promise to always be there. So help me God.

I look back at my husband to see him crying tears in big droplets. He has on his face a look I've never seen before. It's more than happiness, it's more than bliss. It's something ethereal and I knew it had everything to do with the little bundle of perfection I held in my arms.

"I can't believe he's finally here." Fitz whispered.

I understood perfectly what he meant because I felt the same too. With Fitz's hand embracing me, I easily slipped one hand from beneath the baby and replaced it with his and then the other until Fitz was completely holding him in his arms. His whole body started trembling behind me as he buried his face deep in my neck, his tears soaking my hospital gown. I knew exactly what he was feeling. His world as he used to know it was not only being transformed, but he too was becoming a new person. All the love bubbling inside of him was also something intense and new; something unexpected; something eternal. He was complete.

I watched Fitz graze a lone finger across his brow and I listened intently to the sound of my son breathing and beating heart. And suddenly, I couldn't even picture my life before him.

"He's so perfect." Fitz cooed. "So perfect."

I leaned back against Fitz's chest as he captured my lips in a breathless kiss. We were so lost in our own bubble, so deeply captivated by the new life in our arms that we just kinda let ourselves be. We didn't think to go announce to our awaiting family that there was a new member in our family who is beyond perfection. We just wanted to immobilize time and let this moment be something that lasted forever. And it almost did until a nurse came in and asked us if we had a name picked out yet.

…

Three days after Prince Lucas Elias Pope-Grant was born, we were kicked out of James Madison Hospital with a clean bill of health. As Fitz fastened up the car seat in the back of our private car that day, I waited in the parking lot for reality to sink in as Lucas slept peacefully in my arms without a care in the world. I waited for me to freak out and demand Fitz that we take him back, but all I kept doing was going back to him like a magnet- staring at him with all the adoration in the world as he slept and wondering what he was dreaming about. I kept expecting the breathlessness I felt to go away but every time I looked at him, it felt like I was just seeing him for the first time again and my heart filled up, close to bursting with all the love I felt for that little man.

888

 **Olivia's POV**

 _ **One month later…**_

I'm kicking ass at this motherhood thing!

 _ **Flashbacks:**_

 _I wake up every day feeling humbled with the intensity in which I love my son. I don't think I'll ever be able to fully put into words how it feels to be a mom to such a perfect little human being. The first night we brought Lucas home, I burst into tears as soon as we crossed the threshold because for the first time in my life, I felt like everything was right with the world. That first night was easy and I took the opportunity to get as much sleep as possible since all people tell you is that sleep no longer is a factor after one becomes a new parent._

 _Two weeks later, I think it's all bullshit because my baby had to be the most laid back child on the planet. He spends fifteen hours a day sleeping and being perfect. When he wakes up, he barely cries. He just whimpers until he's picked up to be fed, cleaned and then he's right back to sleep, sucking on his tongue-being the most adorable bundle of cuteness you could ever imagine._

 _I on the other, I'm different. During my pregnancy, I read a ton of books and articles telling me how my views of the world will change after having my baby and while that may not be true for every mother out there, it was true for me. I'm not sure when it happened, maybe it was since the very moment Lucas was placed in my arms but I'm forever changed and I'm not afraid to admit it._

 _My eyes were much more open now. I find that many things no longer mattered to me anymore as new things started to matter much more. My way of doing things changed tremendously. I thought about things in more depth. I was softer and more gentle. I even spoke differently and I find that I could control my anger better. I loved harder. I was always cautious when making decision before but now, I find that I'm more calculated with the choices and decisions I make._

 _Case in point:_

 _At two weeks old, Fitz and I decided to make our first public appearance since Lucas was born. With Fitz's family history and him being the Governor of New York and me basically running my own crisis firm, ruling New York City one dirty file at a time and playing Captain Savior for some of the biggest names in the politics, we're both in the public eye and we're ranked as one of the most elite couples there ever was. Don't let all that shit fool you though. Fitz and I are pretty private. More so now because of Lucas. Anyways, to make a long story short, we made our first public appearance together two weeks after I'd given birth. That particular day, I was feeling kind of insecure about my body so I got all geared up in sports attire and strapped my baby into his stroller. I was ready for a five miles run and no one could stop me. I'd forgotten that no one was expecting me to bounce back and start walking around the place like Beyoncé after having just given birth- because realistically, who the hell really bounced back that fast?_

 _But for some reason that day, I wasn't thinking about it like that. I was still hormonal, I was feeling like shit and was absolutely disgusted with myself. Looking in the mirror, I knew I was looked fine but I was different so with the extra fat around my waist, I thought my husband would never look at me the way he used to and if Fitz stopped looking at me like I was the sexiest and hottest thing to him, he certainly wouldn't fuck me anymore. I was pissed and on a mission to lose all the weigh I'd gained in one day._

 _"Why do you look like someone's running after you?" Fitz asked when I was halfway out of the house._

 _I thought I'd left him asleep upstairs and I cursed him for having the worst timing in the world. I didn't want him to see me like this._

 _"Just going for a run." I replied._

 _He's frowning like he's onto me. Like he knows I'm being ridiculous and he's gonna make me talk about it even though I have no intention of letting him know just how disgusted I feel with myself. "Your stitches aren't healed yet." He said._

 _Like I didn't know!_

 _"I meant a walk." I recanted._

 _Now he knows I'm bullshitting him._

 _"Fine." He sighed. "Just give me a minute to change and I'll come with."_

 _I don't know how to tell him that I don't want him to come with me. I become frustrated with myself and I can feel the tears coming so I take a deep breath before the damn dam broke and I'm forced to confess what truly is bothering me._

 _Twenty minutes later, we're out the door. Fitz's security detail joins us on foot after parking a car just two miles from our location. They tail behind us, looking like normal civilians and you'd never guess in a million years that they were actually government registered weapons_ — _trained and able to kill with a poke of the finger. Fitz pushed the stroller with one hand as the other is wrapped around my waist. I'm lost in my own head as we walk a bike trail nearby a lake. It's on the other side of Manhattan and it's very beautiful at this time of the year when the spring weather is just right. Despite being known to the public, we're not bothered by people and that's exactly why I loved New York. It's not Hollywood where there would be about sixty cameras in our faces by now, as we're being harassed by paparazzis and bombarded with a million questions about Lucas and our personal life in general since we became parents. Here in New York though, everyone just goes about their business so we're able to blend in and look like any regular couple just having an evening stroll._

 _We don't talk much although I'm sure Fitz can tell that I'm in a mood and I appreciate him all the more for not pushing me to share._

 _Of course, as irony would have it, out of all the places in the world we could end up at an hour later, we find ourselves at the super market where we run the risk of being recognized. With the help of our black caps, we were in perfect disguise which made it easier for us to freely move without worrying about becoming front page news by the eleven o'clock news later that night._

 _As we browsed the shopping aisles, I found myself examining the nutrition facts for every item that went in the cart. I guess I could chop it off to me being a very picky eater, but even that was debatable at the moment with the way I was feeling. Occasionally, I would catch Fitz snooping in some unhealthy junk in the cart and it's the funniest thing to me because I could swear that he thought he was being discreet about it. He has the sweetest sweet tooth for a guy and all those things he "sneaks" into the cart are things that are prone to put him one step closer to a heart attack so it became a game for me to switch up all those junk for something healthier or less strong in sugar and in size._

 _Next, we stacked up on meat, lots of fruits and veggies. And when we were ready to pay, we let one of the agents check us out at the register while the other one took off about ten minutes earlier to go pull our car around._

 _By the time we get home, Lucas is awake and alert. He's sucking on his tongue and putting his hands in his mouth which is usually a sign that he's hungry so I rush to feed him his eight o'clock bottle before I get a monster on my hands. I save the breast feeding method for much later, like in the middle of the night when he's having trouble going back to sleep. I can pretend it's all him but the truth is, I loved breast feeding him early in the morning and late at night because I feel so connected to him during those hours. It's the most ridiculous thing but I find myself talking to him and telling him all my little secrets like he understood me. But it's our way of bonding and it's very special. When I coo or sing to him while I rock with him in the chair in the nursery, I can almost swear that he smiles even though I know it's just gas._

 _Much later after my little man is put to bed and I'm fresh out of the shower, I heard Fitz downstairs going through the food pantry. I hear the loud ruffling of bags and the slamming of cabinets before he's screaming my name from the bottom of the stairs. I don't even have to ask why he's yelling. I know I'm busted._

 _I get downstairs and the sight I'm met with is not a happy one._

 _"Yes, Fitzgerald?" I play coy._

 _He's still looking through the cabinets. "Any idea where my box of chocolate bars went?" He asked._

 _"I switched them out for the peanut and oatmeal ones." I replied._

 _When Fitz's attention turn fully to me, he's visibly popping a vein. His eyes are wide with anger as he yelled: "Those are boring!"_

 _See, now that's just a lie. In my opinion, nature valley bars are very delicious and the fact that they're very healthy in protein was a bonus._

 _"Would you calm down, please?" I pleaded with him._

 _He's just now catching on that I've switched up all his snacks. His favored salted, vinegar potato chips had been switched for slightly salted ones. He absolutely hates because to him they tasted like saltines. Tasteless and boring! His spirits were crushed when he found out that the store-made American cupcakes he'd picked were also left behind and instead were replaced with macarons._

 _Oh he was seething! I'm pretty sure he hated me in that moment but you see, that was fine by me because I did it in the name of love. That heart attack I was worried about is no longer pending. Hell, it's non-existent to me at this point. I could take him being mad at me over some stupid snack if he meant I got him for another sixty years. I needed him around for a very long time._

 _"I bet you didn't switch out your popcorns for something boring!" He shouted. "That's so unfair, Olivia." As I looked at his face just then, I couldn't help the laugh that escaped my lips. It was like I was getting a little snippet into the future when Lucas is much older and I won't let him make poor eating choices. The image warmed my heart just as much as it churned my stomach. Even though I knew I had nothing to worry about as of yet because Lucas was still very much my perfect little baby, I also knew that time moves fast and there's gonna come a day when he's gonna grow up. It wasn't even here yet but I dreaded that day coming with all my being._

 _"Why in the hell would you do that for?" He finally asked._

 _"Because I want you to live." My answer must've sounded completely preposterous to him because he just stood there and stared at with arms folded over his chest as if I'd sprout a second head. "I know it sounds ridiculous to you but I want our children to have a father who's healthy and can spend hours in our yard, goofing around with them."_

 _I must've said something good because in the middle of my monologue, he started giving me this look. It's a look I know very well and it never fails to make me weak in the knees or send butterflies swimming in my stomach. It's the same look that's had me jump him like a bitch in heat multiple times and have me drilled against a wall._

 _"What?" I asked, blushing. I pushed a strand of curls behind my ears and looked at my feet. Fitz has been many things to me over the course of my life. He's been my best friend, my crush, my lover, my boyfriend, my first real heartbreak, and then, it rotated back in cycles as we grew and became more experienced with the world. He's been my second chance, my partner, my fiancé, my husband, my soulmate and now, the father of my child. There's a lot of history between us which is why, I can't believe that after all these years of knowing this man, he still has the ability to make me act like I'm fifteen all over again with just one look. All my insecurities about the way I looked from early is thrown out of the window into thin air because at the moment, with this man's eyes on me, I feel like a Goddess and I know that to him, I looked every bit the part._

 _"Why are you looking at me like that, Grant?"_

 _Gone was the temper tantrum he was throwing just seconds ago and before I know it, he's approaching me and gathering me up in his arms, still wearing that stupid 'I'm-in-love-with-you' look on his face along with a small smile that certainly reached his vibrant blue eyes. One of my hands is brought to his lips as the other one is wrapped around his waist. We look like a cliché swaying barefoot in our pajamas in the middle of our kitchen. For God's sake, we had a baby, we were parents but for some reason, we were stuck acting like we were nineteen and the best part of it is that I fell in love with him just a little bit more because of that._

 _"You said children." He finally spoke. "As in more than one. As in somewhere up here in that beautiful brain of yours, you're thinking about letting me knock you up again in the nearest future." His smile gets bigger and he looks more like a cute idiot with every word. "Do you want more kids, Mama?"_

 _I nod to him. We were barely a month in with our first baby and already we were discussing having more when a year ago, we barely uttered the word kids out loud to each other as if it wasn't even part of the English dictionary._

 _"I do." I replied. Bending my head, I hid my face in his chest to hide the color creeping up on my cheeks. "I know it sounds crazy to be having this conversation so soon after Lucas but I do… I want more kids with you." Looking back up at Fitz, I can't help but shake my head. "I want a whole soccer team of them."_

 _Even as he wore the happiest smile on his face, Fitz started feeling my forehead for a temperature because clearly, something had to be wrong with me. I don't usually talk about this kind of stuff and I guess it came as a shock to him that I was even entertaining the idea of more kids._

 _"Stop it." I chuckled, smacking his hand away._

 _A few minutes later, he's still staring at me with that look and I can't stand how nauseously girlish it makes me feel. "Are you gonna say anything?" I asked._

 _He shrugged, shaking his head. "I just love you." He said._

 _And then I'm being kissed breathless. It's the best kind of kiss. It's the kind of kiss that lifts you off the ground, ruins you and leaves you wanting more. It's the kind of kiss that poets write about. It's the kind of kiss that makes the stars in the sky shine and makes the world seem bright. It's the kind of kiss that take forever and no time at all. It's everything. And it's my favorite kind of all._

 _888_

 _Week three approached fast and throughout it, Lucas is still my perfect infant who sleeps fifteen hours a day. I get a lot of visitors throughout the week who are still dropping gifts. I don't know what the hell I'm gonna do with all of it but one of the guest rooms in the house is filled with baby crap that Lucas will either grow out of in no time or never get to use at all. But as I said before, it's the thought that counts._

 _On Thursday, Lucas is a little fussy when he wakes up. With allergy season in session, I take his temperature to make sure he's not gonna be coming down with nothing before we sat down in our rocking chair for our bonding hour while I breastfeed. I honestly love the way his little palm rest on my chest as he latches on my breast and when he's finally able to taste the milk, he makes the cutest sounds._

 _We spend the day with my mom and Abby who fawn over his cuteness the whole time. At three weeks old, I'm convinced that I've bred the best looking baby there ever was. Mr. Lucas Pope-Grant is his father through and through on most days. He's got the smoothest, softest, most beautiful caramel complexion; clearly a mixture of both Fitz and I. His hair is a crazy mess of silky raven curls. He's got my button nose (thank God) and also my lips but it's his eyes that are the most captivating. Framed by thick dark lashes, they're the most striking shade of cornflower blue. More than the beautiful color and shape of them, it's the innocence held behind them that stole one's breath and clung to their heartstrings. He's truly perfect._

 _Fitz and I look at him every day and take in the change in him because we don't wanna miss a thing. Most nights, we bicker about whether or not the color of his eyes will eventually change as he grows bigger. While Fitz wants them to change to a honey brown or a really light hazel, I say I don't really care because either way, he'll still be perfect and I'll still love him but secretly, deep down in my heart, I hope they stay the color they are, forever young, innocent and captivating._

 _Lucas stayed wide awake throughout the whole day, supposedly to put on a show for the ladies and keep us entertained as my mother so cleverly put it. Already at three weeks old, he was a ladies man. It came with the title of being a Grant man. He only fell asleep after his bath and mid-day feeding but that was only for a couple of hours. He was up again just in time when Fitz got home for the office. They goofed around together in the living room on the couch for hours. He only started fussing again when he was tired of Fitz waving his phone in his face for an obnoxious amount of selfies._

 _"Sick of your old man already?" Fitz pouted. "I thought you were my best guy, buddy? What's going on?"_

 _I laughed at them as I brought Fitz two bottles. A medium one with milk and a small one with water._

 _"I'd be sick of you too if you spent fifteen minutes waving a phone in my face." I bend down and finally kiss his lips. "Hi, Papa."_

 _"Your mama's trynna get freaky with me, buddy." He said. "You okay with that?"_

 _I could've sworn Lucas groaned in disapproval. In waving his tiny little hands, he ended up smacking Fitz in the face. No harm was done but I could've sworn that was on purpose too._

 _Fitz's eyes widen. "Did you see that, baby? He just smacked me!" He marveled as I fastened a bib around Lucas's neck. "He's not about sharing his mommy. I don't think he likes that idea at all."_

 _"The apple doesn't fall very far from the tree." I remarked._

 _A grin blossomed on Fitz's face as he looked at me. "And just what are you implying Carolyn Grant?"_

 _I rolled my eyes. "All I'm saying is, I know a very possessive man just like that and I happened to have married him and had his baby."_

 _Fitz looked at the cobalt blue wedding band on his left fourth finger. The words 'ever thine, ever yours, ever ours' were engraved inside the band and every time Fitz looked at that ring, it was a reminder of the best choice he's ever made in his life. "So I supposed I'm the very possessive man you're speaking of?" He smirked._

 _I shrugged. "If the shoe fits." I replied, handing him the bottle of milk. "Feed him. I'm gonna go masturbate in the shower."_

 _"Okay." He said._

 _I'd barely made it to the bottom of the staircase when I heard my name being shouted. I guess he had finally registered what I said and I couldn't help but laugh. I know, I'm cruel. Still, don't let yourself be fooled. Fitz is a savage compared to me._

…

 _Later that night…_

 _Nothing could prepare me for the onslaught of screeching that awakened me at three o'clock in the morning that night. As soon as the sound came through the baby monitor, I nearly jumped out of bed, convinced that there must be a monster in my child's bedroom because up until that very moment, Lucas had never gone passed a few levels of whimpers to let me know when he needed me._

 _Flicking on the light at my entrance in the room, I tied my robe as I felt a little bit chilly before I approached the crib in which my son was screaming his little lungs off. For a few seconds, I just stared at him, his little short legs were kicking in his onesie and his face was becoming red. I just stood there and watched him, completely shocked that such a tiny little person possessed such powerful sets of lungs that could elicit such voluminous screams. It threw me off a little bit._

 _"Shhh… I'm here, baby." I cooed. "Mommy's got you." I picked him up from his crib and bounced my way towards the changing area with him._

 _His pacifier kept him occupied as I changed his full diaper but before I could finish dressing him up again, the screeching begin again. I tried to work as fast as possible to get him fed but apparently I wasn't being quick enough because the screaming only got louder._

 _My heart rate speeds up just a little bit because I'm not used to this from him yet. He doesn't normally wake up at three o'clock in the morning. When I put him to sleep at eight, he usually wakes up once at twelve on the dot and I feed him again before he's passed out again till morning at six o'clock. This was new to me._

 _We got downstairs successfully with him working on quieting down. I made his bottle in under two minutes, a skill that I'm very proud of and then I took a seat around the dinning room table with him on my lap. Everything's wonderful after that as he feeds and slowly, I feel myself calming down too. Usually, he doesn't even finish his bottle before he's fast asleep again but tonight, I get hysterical screaming again halfway through feeding time._

 _Now I'm freaking out as I stand up to walk the perimeter of the kitchen with him. It's not working. I try giving him some water, he rejects that. I try the pacifier, that ends up across the room. I try singing, I get more tears. I don't know what else to do with him because all my mommy tricks are failing tonight. Playing with his hair usually gets him to calm down but tonight, it does nothing to soothe my baby. I feel tears starting to brim behind my eyes because what if he's sick? At the thought, I run upstairs for a thermometer to get his temperature. He's fine. Temperature is normal so there is no signs of fever. I try kisses next, those don't do shit._

 _Fitz is very dead to the world right now and I'm in the middle of what I've resigned to be my child's first full meltdown and I can't do nothing to help him because nothing I do is working._

 _"Come on, pumpkin. What's wrong?"_

 _I've never felt more useless and powerless than in this very moment and just when I think I might burst into tears along with Lucas, Fitz comes stumbling down the stairs, rubbing the sleep from his eyes, wearing nothing but a pair of flannel pajama bottoms._

 _"I've tried everything." I informed my husband. "What's wrong with our baby, Fitz?"_

 _He wiped my fallen tears away and kissed my lips before grabbing Lucas from me. "He's fine, Mama. Go take a minute. I got him."_

 _Feeling defeated and like a failure to my own child, I didn't even fight Fitz on his request. I just walked back up the stairs, feeling a strong urge to go cry my soul out. I'm his mom and I couldn't calm him down. Maybe I wasn't as good at this motherhood thing as I thought I was._

 _Five minutes later, I hear nothing. Not a sound and I guessed it was because I was locked away in the bathroom with red puffy eyes, feeling sorry for myself. I wanted to know if Lucas was still crying so I got out of the room and put an ear out to listen if I could still hear him. Nothing. Not a peep._

 _Wanting to know what exactly did the trick of calming him down, I made my way down the stairs and when I walked into the living room, I'm greeted with the most beautiful sight that instantly melts away all my doubt and self-pity about being a good mother to my son._

 _There in the living room, sitting on the couch in front of the TV are my two favorite boys watching some encore of a basketball game on the ESPN channel. Fitz had stripped off Lucas's onesie so he's naked from the top down much like his father. Chest to chest with his pacifier in his mouth, I watched Lucas listen intently to his father as Fitz explained all the plays being shown. They were bonding._

 _It was then that I realized that not every victory can or has be mine when it came to parenting and luckily for my son, he's got an incredible father who knows just what he needs and when. Fitz called Lucas his best guy and it dawned on me that although he was just three weeks old, my little boy knew that his father was his best guy too and he could count on him for moments as simple as watching basketball games. More than incredible and completely heart-swelling, this was a teachable moment for me._

 _After a few minutes, Fitz must've of sensed my presence in the room because he turned around and winked at me as he waved me over. "There's space here for you too, mommy."_

 _I gladly walked over and when I'm close enough, he wraps his arms around my neck and pull me in against his naked chest. I'm comforted by the warmth of his soft skin and his masculine scent._

 _I always felt like Fitz could read my mind so it didn't come as a surprise to me when he pressed a kiss at the crown of my head and whispered: "You're still the best mom in the world to him."_

 _"I know." I smiled as I pressed a kiss on his shoulder. "He just needed you on this one."_

 _Fitz nodded. "He needed me." He sounded close to tears as he said it. "My son needed me."_

 _And in that moment, I knew just how much this all meant to him. He felt like a father and he was a damn great one. I fell in love with him just a little bit more._

 _A few minutes later, Fitz spoke again. His voice was laced with love and adoration as he stared at our sleeping monster on his chest. "We made a damn good looking kid." He said._

 _Bare chested and sucking on his pacifier with his tiny little hand balled in a fist under his chin, I couldn't help but feel that breathlessness again as I stared at my son. I could only agree with Fitz. "We did."_

 _Crying monster or not, Prince Lucas Elias Grant was still my perfect baby and watching him asleep on my husband's chest fully solidified what I already knew. He knows not of the brutality of this world; he knows not of the evil darkness that's resides deep inside everyone. He knows nothing. And that's what makes him perfect._

 _Right then, I felt very compelled to grab my husband's face and kiss him into a world of perfection and I did just that, wasting no time. I kissed him and he kissed me back. It's a kiss filled with a lot of promises for more moments like these but more than that, it's also filled with gratefulness._

 _Instead of saying those three little words we both know to be true to each other, we decided to end the night with a new beginning. And it all starts up again with a word we're both very familiar with._

 _"Hi." I whispered._

 _He wore that stupid look again and he looked very much like my cute idiot._

 _"…Hi."_


End file.
